Last night I received some oddball text messages, from a strange woman. While I’m currently parsing them, and still debating as to how much of her story I want to post publicly, I thought I’d make some general observations about stories like hers. In order to do that, I have to write a whole post describing the source. Here goes…
- Jenny, the thirtysomething sender of late-night texts
- Joe, until recently, husband of Jenny
- Susie, adopted daughter of Joe, biological daughter of Jenny
When young Boxer was about 14, he met a girl also 14, named Jenny. Jenny was entirely too good for him. She let him know this at every possible opportunity. As both these kids lived in a small town, in the middle of nowhere, they couldn’t escape each other, (try as they did.)
When Boxer was in his mid-20s, and living in Vancouver, BC, Jenny found him on one of the gay social media sites, and quickly connected. Jenny was living in the Toronto ON area, by then, and married to a nice guy named Joe. Boxer was amused to see this bitch again, and the two started conversing, randomly and irregularly. 100% of those interactions were initiated by Jenny.
Some of my own memories of Jenny include the following…
At or about 18 years old, Jenny and a 21-year old returned missionary named Danny announced their engagement. Jenny is the grandchild of converts, while Danny comes from one of the old school Mormon founding families. This is a big deal to my people, and Danny’s ma and pa shitcanned those wedding plans immediately.
As an aside, and this is neither here nor there, Danny is a relative of mine, and he never got married, and is now the same sort of playa I am. I often wonder if ma and pa don’t agonize about that decision, today.
In the interim, having had a wedding date announced, Jenny and Danny started fucking the hell out of each other. Suddenly, when ma and pa pulled the plug, Danny got his ring back, and Jenny was no longer eligible to marry a decent Mormon (i.e. she wasn’t a virgin any longer – this is a dealbreaker for Mormon families.)
With this in mind, Jenny disappears to Calgary, and ya boy Boxer never hears another thing from her, until around 2008, when she appears as a fagbook friend request, and gives the impression of having the perfect life.
Jenny reappears, and she’s changed a bit. She’s converted to Christianity, for one thing. For another, she’s got a kid.
While Jenny publicly wore the persona of perfect wife and devoted mother, she would privately flirt with Boxer, who would generally ignore her. She also asked (and asked, and asked) about Danny. I was a younger man at the time, and wasn’t as practiced at reading skank-ho wimminz, but every man in this post code knows why she was asking, and her original friend request was probably more motivated by the desire to ask me about “the one who got away.”
In late 2015, Jenny started becoming more bold in her flirtatious messages, and would frequently send Boxer unsolicited nudes and talk about fucking him. Boxer continued to ignore this nonsense, sure in his own mind that she was just trying to mess with him, in precisely the same fashion she was wont to do some fifteen years prior.
In 2017, Boxer finally allowed Jenny to open up, in text, and learned her story.
Here we reach the delimiter between my firsthand knowledge, and what she told me when I asked about her life. Here’s the shit she claimed happened to her…
At 18, she left our little town (good for her) and converted to Christianity. My understanding is that both her parents, and her sister, have also converted to Christianity. My people wouldn’t care too much about this, because they were a convert family of only a couple generations anyway… (so long, and thanks for all the fish.)
While in Calgary, she hooked up with a series of random dudes. One of them was a very successful singer, and she went on singing tours backing up this swingin’ dick. Anyway, very shortly after this, she became pregnant. She gave birth to Susie, having no idea who the father of the little girl was.
The lounge singer gave her the brush, and while it may well have been his kid, she didn’t pursue him. At first, like the typical Canadian wimminz, she decided she didn’t need no man, but rapidly realized she couldn’t raise the kid herself.
Jenny married and divorced at least three men, in rapid succession, over the course of not more than two years. The last marriage took, and the lucky winner of Jenny’s used up cunt was Joe: the same man she was (then) pretending to be happily married to on facebook.
When she told me this story, I asked about the two ex-husbands. She (surprise!) described them as assholes, druggies, violent abusers, perverts who would surely have raped her baby, etc., ad infinitvm.
I asked her (as is my general tactic) where these violent headcases were serving their prison sentences. Naturally, neither went to prison, because Jenny was lying, and I assume she was libeling them for the sake of her own ego.
Before I continue, I ought to thank Jenny for giving me the equivalent of a graduate degree in female nature. There are a number of valuable lessons in her story, and while I learned these lessons from Jenny, I really don’t think they’re unique to her. These childish coping mechanisms seem common to most wimminz.
- No man is ever a regular guy. All men are either dreamy, amazing supermen (Virginkiller Danny, the lounge singer, etc.) or they are subhuman scum, unfit to live (the first two husbands, whoever knocked her up, etc..) There simply is no in-between.
- No wimminz ever does anything wrong. Certainly not Jenny. Everything that happened was always the fault of some man. To hear her tell it, the conception of her daughter was some sort of voodoo curse, for which all men are responsible, rather than a natural consequence of her spreading-and-bending for her nightly dose of anonymous semen.
- No favor one does a wimminz is ever appreciated. Two men married this bitch, when she was a single mom, and their reward was paying alimony to the slut, and having themselves libeled as abusive perverts. I’m sure many other men did her favors, over the years, and to date, I’m equally certain that all of them have regretted it, including Joe, her current husband, and the adopted father of Jenny’s daughter. His story is coming this weekend.