It’s American Independence Day. That means it’s time to get drunk, shoot your pistol into the air, and imagine a world free of feminism. As men we are allowed to have big dreams, and as men we are also obligated to deal with the world as it is.
While I await the fireworks, I decided to skim the lowbrow articles on the internet. Feminist pseudojournalist Caitlin Dewey delivers, as she has before…
Apparently, a guy named Sebastian designed a bot to “like” all the filthy tinder sluts in his immediate area. He had 150 dates. The result was a whole lot of wasted time and money. A quick gander at the article suggests his mistaken application of the application, to wit…
Anyone who has been lounging in this postal code for a while knows the score. There is very little in the way of “serious girlfriend” prospects on the swingers sites. The people you meet there are generally overweight, indebted, and sexually unscrupulous. Not the types of wimminz you want to count on in good times and bad.
Sebastian lives in the Gay Bay: San Francisco; and, while I don’t know what the market is like there, I’m confident that he’ll save both time and money looking for a unicorn in person. The only thing Tinder is good for is cheap, no-strings sex.
And if Sebastian did meet a Tinder wimminz he decided to settle down with, what would be a plausible result?
A wimminz who has been on tinder, at least in the last couple of years, is most likely damaged goods. She has become accustomed to being run through by strangers, and the novelty she has found enjoyable will lead her to scuttle any chances of a serious long term commitment. I’m betting our bearded brother, seen above, originally met his slut wife on tinder. I also bet she put on a pretty convincing show to get that marriage certificate signed and filed. Once she had the upper hand, she began cucking him publicly.
Imagine being that guy, featuring prominently in the advertisement your wife places on the internet, as she looks for strange dick to ride.
Of course, some wimminz are slightly more subtle…
Kyla has “never been on [tinder] before.” We all believe her. Those of you chaste fellas, who don’t use these sites, don’t understand the details of what’s actually going on here. Let your brother Boxer explain.
Tinder features GPS technology, to match you with sluts in your immediate area. Kyla here left her boyfriend in Ohio, and went to Las Vegas “with the girls.” Even if her boyfriend got on Tinder, he wouldn’t be likely to see her advertising for new dick, because his location is so far removed. The men in Las Vegas, however, get to see everything she posts. Kyla is thus free to be as big a slut as possible, with little fear of being found out.
If your girl admits to being on tinder, at least in the past couple of years, then you can be confident that I (and many others) have already fucked her. We all rejected her, and you should also.
Happy Birthday, America!