Unlike many on the alt-right, I do not LARP as a monarchist, and I make no secret of my apathy toward the royal family. I think Canadians should have dumped this dysfunctional crew of layabouts long ago. And so, it is with subdued glee that I welcome my new skank-ho overlord, Meghan Markle, into the scroungy bunch who signs off on my travel documents. The chaos she will bring to our masters will be a great source of personal amusement to me.
Meghan Markle is already a divorcée. She was, unknown to many, married to a man named Trevor Engelson. They tied the knot in a traditional Jewish wedding in Jamaica, in 2011. Less than two years later, young Meghan ran her husband face-first through the divorce courts. I guess all those religious vows and promises went out the window, when the skank realized she could get a big payday.
A Portrait of The Con-Artist as A Young Prostitute
Meghan Markle in 2010, with her first husband, Trevor Engelson.
Skank-ho Meghan in traditional religious “chair dance” at her first wedding.
To recap: Markle promised, in a traditional Jewish wedding, to love, respect, honor and obey her husband, Trevor Engelson. She divorced him two years later, getting an undisclosed payout as reward for breaking her most important promises. Scumbag biographer of the rich and idle, Andrew Morton, describes skank-ho filing the divorce papers as a shocking surprise to Engelson, who said it came “out of the blue.” Markle sent back her wedding and engagement rings to her husband through the mail, from Canada, in the same week she filed the papers. I can only assume that she had already started making eyes at another series of men.
Fast forward to the present: Harry, a man who volunteered to serve in Afghanistan (where he further fought in the field – which he didn’t have to do) somehow sees skanky Meghan as wife material. Harry has now married Meghan in another traditional religious wedding, where Meghan made a big to-do about refusing to promise to obey her husband.
Harry, of course, has the money to send Meghan packing, and he almost certainly will. At best we can hope that he doesn’t let this dysfunctional feminist have any of his children to hold hostage. If we condemn him, it is for inflating the egos of skank-ho wimminz everywhere, who will now see the normalization of slutty divorcées trading up to a bona-fide prince, after demonstrating the inability to keep their most important promises.